Dear Dan McElwee,
… Where to even start with you sir. You were my first college roommate (I had 3 different roommates my freshman year). Man the memories come back to our dorm room, Prentiss 108! Which we actually kept clean because we both were rarely in there. You were pledging a Fraternity for the only semester that you were at college. Why did you drop out so fast? I can't remember for the life of me. At least you got to experience one semester of college right? Well I do have to apologize for making fun of you all the time.. I mean seriously it was way too much fun mimicking your one-of-a-kind voice. I think I can still do it to this day… yep, still got it. (Heey maaan, How'sss it gooinng.) Gotta figure out how to get audio on this, cause that just doesn't do justice.
Your profile pick is pretty tight. You sir, definitely look like the Mad Hatter. Like scary good… not a Johnny Depp kind of good, but you are creepy enough to pull it off. That's in a good way! I hope that you still don't have that crazy screaming band chick poster hanging up that you adored soo much. I mean sometimes I'd walk in and you'd be staring at that poster a little too… well we won't get into that. I remember you did some crazy stuff when J-dawg (2nd roommate, I was in a build up room, which is 3 people in a 2 person dorm) was in the room looking at "adult" websites. I don't even know where to start in the explanation that he was looking up that, and you were.. we'll having too much fun with yourself. Anyways, I hope you've grown out of that phase in life, and accomplishing something. If not, well I guess that's why I haven't heard from you in… 5 years.
Well whatever adventures you're off doing in this crazy world, God Speed
Alastar Swift
Ps. I'm finally graduating this year. How about you?
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Facebook Friend #8
Dear Eric Hattey,
First and foremost, I would like to thank you for letting me come to your party when I was a freshman (high school). I had been chasing that upper-class girl (Junior) and she brought me to your place. I remember that you had pulled me aside, gave me a high five, and said, "If you need a spare room, let me know." As being a freshman, I definitely was scared and laughed that one off, even though I know that would have been the best night ever! That night, I learned more than I wanted too, as you told me about the Shrek story that pertained to you and your lady friend. I don't think I'll ever be able to view that movie the same after this remembering that fact. I'm sure I have more memories especially since I was chasing that girl who happened to be part of your friend group, but my memory fades as life has sped me far away from being a high school freshman.
According to your status, You currently are on a diet. I would like to congratulate you on that feat and hope that you also have a work out plan. Diet and and Exercise go hand in hand, like Pumpkin Pie and Whipped, Mashed Potatoes and Gravy, and Turkey and Stuffing. So I hope you stick to your healthy diet plan and accomplish it to your wildest dreams. Is that a for sale sign with a "SOLD" across it? I am going to guess that you bought that piece of land to build your first house? Rock on, you better practice with those lincoln logs to produce a space efficient design.
Good luck with growing up sir, and thank you for introducing me to the "Upper-Classmen" and giving me a chance with that girl.
Cheerio,
Alastar Swift
First and foremost, I would like to thank you for letting me come to your party when I was a freshman (high school). I had been chasing that upper-class girl (Junior) and she brought me to your place. I remember that you had pulled me aside, gave me a high five, and said, "If you need a spare room, let me know." As being a freshman, I definitely was scared and laughed that one off, even though I know that would have been the best night ever! That night, I learned more than I wanted too, as you told me about the Shrek story that pertained to you and your lady friend. I don't think I'll ever be able to view that movie the same after this remembering that fact. I'm sure I have more memories especially since I was chasing that girl who happened to be part of your friend group, but my memory fades as life has sped me far away from being a high school freshman.
According to your status, You currently are on a diet. I would like to congratulate you on that feat and hope that you also have a work out plan. Diet and and Exercise go hand in hand, like Pumpkin Pie and Whipped, Mashed Potatoes and Gravy, and Turkey and Stuffing. So I hope you stick to your healthy diet plan and accomplish it to your wildest dreams. Is that a for sale sign with a "SOLD" across it? I am going to guess that you bought that piece of land to build your first house? Rock on, you better practice with those lincoln logs to produce a space efficient design.
Good luck with growing up sir, and thank you for introducing me to the "Upper-Classmen" and giving me a chance with that girl.
Cheerio,
Alastar Swift
Monday, November 15, 2010
Facebook Friend #7
Dear Nathan Ahlers,
Strange that I am deleting a fellow Nathan. As I refresh my mind of past memories that I may of had with you, I remember slightly that you were one of those college d-bags. Yes, quite harsh I must state but you deserve it for jumping my friend freshman year when he was walking with his girlfriend. That sir, is not manly. Oh and I remember tracking you down that night and confronting you at a house party. Thinking you were all badass for "beating up someone". Tisk-tisk, what would your mother say if she found out her little boy was jumping innocent couples under the moonlight. I'm sure she wouldn't give you anymore presents… ass. But I must take back some of the harsh-ness, as you did drive me back to my dorms one night as I proceeded to pass out in the bathroom toilet for my best friend to find me. And of course, he then felt the urge to take as many pictures as possible. Thanks again Facebook friend.
Well at first glance, I totally forgot what you looked like, and then I had to guess that you weren't the really creepy dude in your profile picture because 1) I doubt I'd add someone that creepy and 2) I think you were in my freshman orientation class. Anyways, I'd like to add that what the heck is "Ragbrai"? That was your last status post, something on the lines of day 4 of Ragbrai. Sounds kinky, but I'm sure it's quite worthwhile.
Godspeed on whatever adventures you may take in the near future.
Alastar Swift
Strange that I am deleting a fellow Nathan. As I refresh my mind of past memories that I may of had with you, I remember slightly that you were one of those college d-bags. Yes, quite harsh I must state but you deserve it for jumping my friend freshman year when he was walking with his girlfriend. That sir, is not manly. Oh and I remember tracking you down that night and confronting you at a house party. Thinking you were all badass for "beating up someone". Tisk-tisk, what would your mother say if she found out her little boy was jumping innocent couples under the moonlight. I'm sure she wouldn't give you anymore presents… ass. But I must take back some of the harsh-ness, as you did drive me back to my dorms one night as I proceeded to pass out in the bathroom toilet for my best friend to find me. And of course, he then felt the urge to take as many pictures as possible. Thanks again Facebook friend.
Well at first glance, I totally forgot what you looked like, and then I had to guess that you weren't the really creepy dude in your profile picture because 1) I doubt I'd add someone that creepy and 2) I think you were in my freshman orientation class. Anyways, I'd like to add that what the heck is "Ragbrai"? That was your last status post, something on the lines of day 4 of Ragbrai. Sounds kinky, but I'm sure it's quite worthwhile.
Godspeed on whatever adventures you may take in the near future.
Alastar Swift
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Facebook Friend #6
Dear Amanda Vernon,
Why your name brings back found memories. Memories of the first day little Alastar Swift set foot onto the "college" world. You were my freshman orientation leader, and you also lied to me! Telling me that all those 8am meetings were required and that I shouldn't go out and party hard. But let's be honest, I still went out, Living the Dream, as some might say. I do have to thank you for your help one weekend night where my friend went to jail. I had called you to find out where the police station was because my friend decided not to run away from the cops, and then proceeded to tell them a fake name. Thinking of it now, I could have received my first minor that night as my friend and I went to the station to pick him up, and my friend had to blow zeroes in order to let our friend out. Good thing I didn't step up to do that, or else I would have be @$%&!
I see that you are married according to Facebook. Congratulations. I do not think that I could take that step anytime in the near future as I have no idea what I'm going to be doing in the next couple years. Don't get me wrong, I might meet the perfect girl tomorrow and totally change my mind but as of right now, Single is the way to go. Reading your past couple status updates, I see that you REALLY enjoy snow. I'm definitely the opposite, I hate making that dreaded walk to my classes. I put on layers of clothes to endure the winter blizzard and then when I get to class I have to strip down to a t-shirt because all the classrooms are like 75+ degrees. Mind you that my house, usually hovers around 58-62 degrees. So I'm used to freezing. Anyways, at least one of us like the Minnesotan winters, Hopefully I'll move somewhere warmer next year.
Remember the circle of trust and that to make a relationship work, sometimes telling everything isn't the best.
Cheerio
Alastar Swift
Why your name brings back found memories. Memories of the first day little Alastar Swift set foot onto the "college" world. You were my freshman orientation leader, and you also lied to me! Telling me that all those 8am meetings were required and that I shouldn't go out and party hard. But let's be honest, I still went out, Living the Dream, as some might say. I do have to thank you for your help one weekend night where my friend went to jail. I had called you to find out where the police station was because my friend decided not to run away from the cops, and then proceeded to tell them a fake name. Thinking of it now, I could have received my first minor that night as my friend and I went to the station to pick him up, and my friend had to blow zeroes in order to let our friend out. Good thing I didn't step up to do that, or else I would have be @$%&!
I see that you are married according to Facebook. Congratulations. I do not think that I could take that step anytime in the near future as I have no idea what I'm going to be doing in the next couple years. Don't get me wrong, I might meet the perfect girl tomorrow and totally change my mind but as of right now, Single is the way to go. Reading your past couple status updates, I see that you REALLY enjoy snow. I'm definitely the opposite, I hate making that dreaded walk to my classes. I put on layers of clothes to endure the winter blizzard and then when I get to class I have to strip down to a t-shirt because all the classrooms are like 75+ degrees. Mind you that my house, usually hovers around 58-62 degrees. So I'm used to freezing. Anyways, at least one of us like the Minnesotan winters, Hopefully I'll move somewhere warmer next year.
Remember the circle of trust and that to make a relationship work, sometimes telling everything isn't the best.
Cheerio
Alastar Swift
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Facebook Friend #5
Dear Brianna Jones,
When I had stumbled across your name while going through my friend list, it brought me back to freshman year. To be exact I thought of our English 111 class with the crazy Canadian Professor and how I almost failed his course, but somehow managed a solid, B. Another thing that comes to mind is that I want to say we used to go to house at King and Kansas, or it may be the fact that you always called and asked me where the party is. My fondest memory of us, was when you called me and asked me where a party was, and I led you to a totally wrong street address that I had made up. You had called me multiple times which I never answered and me being me, I was laughing my ass off and probably saying some stupid and immature comments of that nature. I guess that's what happens when you drink way too much and spend more time inebriated than sober. I blame that on my friend that always had to end his night in the garbage can.
From your profile picture, it looks like you enjoyed this past halloween weekend. I'm glad to see that you dressed up for the festivities, as so did I. It looks like you may have dressed up as a biker chick? I'm not positive but it's my best guess, I mean you are dressed all in black leather and showing off as much skin as legally possible. Oh by the way, I would love to know why girls like to type in this certain way, "WhY dO yOu TyPe LiKe ThIs In YoUr StAtUs UpDaTeS?" Somethings just I can't wrap my head around, and this may be one of the things I'll never understand.
I hope everything is well in Dubuque, IA
Alastar Swift
When I had stumbled across your name while going through my friend list, it brought me back to freshman year. To be exact I thought of our English 111 class with the crazy Canadian Professor and how I almost failed his course, but somehow managed a solid, B. Another thing that comes to mind is that I want to say we used to go to house at King and Kansas, or it may be the fact that you always called and asked me where the party is. My fondest memory of us, was when you called me and asked me where a party was, and I led you to a totally wrong street address that I had made up. You had called me multiple times which I never answered and me being me, I was laughing my ass off and probably saying some stupid and immature comments of that nature. I guess that's what happens when you drink way too much and spend more time inebriated than sober. I blame that on my friend that always had to end his night in the garbage can.
From your profile picture, it looks like you enjoyed this past halloween weekend. I'm glad to see that you dressed up for the festivities, as so did I. It looks like you may have dressed up as a biker chick? I'm not positive but it's my best guess, I mean you are dressed all in black leather and showing off as much skin as legally possible. Oh by the way, I would love to know why girls like to type in this certain way, "WhY dO yOu TyPe LiKe ThIs In YoUr StAtUs UpDaTeS?" Somethings just I can't wrap my head around, and this may be one of the things I'll never understand.
I hope everything is well in Dubuque, IA
Alastar Swift
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